wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
