You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
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