Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize