Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Randomize
