I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
