we're blogging at a bar
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
This is classic penis vs brain.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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