I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
