Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
