Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
As shirtless as possible
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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