well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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