sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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