so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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