He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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