Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
