CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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