I'm gonna have a badass scar
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
