Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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