We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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