I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize