Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Drunk is a universal language darling
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
