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i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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