I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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