Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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