It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize