Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize