Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Come see our sink grown plant.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
You dont lie about slip and slides
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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