Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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