i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
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I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
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I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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