You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
