So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
