He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
