If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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