Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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