walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
