; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
