Don't make out with my wife yet
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
