In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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