STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
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We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
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Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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