i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
