OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
