Rock
Scissors
Fuck
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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