i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
