i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
