I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
3 2 1 whiskey
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize