On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome