laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
