I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
