So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
