What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I just had sex on a roof
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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