The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Just puked most of my soul out..
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